To Discipline - But How?

One of our kids, who shall remain nameless, really has us stumped. We instruct our kids to be respectful, honest, and generally nice - to one another and to us. We expect occasional lapses in respect, honesty and kindness - after all, childhood is for learning and growing.

The nameless one, though, resists being respectful, honest or kind. This one has been corrected, redirected, punished, prayed with, prayed for, taught scripture... literally everything we can think of to train up this child in the right ways. This child has no qualms about making faces at siblings - taunting for absolutely no reason (we have watched it happen enough to know it's not revenge for a wrong committed against this one!). This child lies without any hesitation and refuses to admit wrongs... even when we find concrete evidence of the wrongdoing!

It's not my goal to gain confessions. I've learned that when wrong, address the wrong. Generally it works. I don't ask if they did it. I rarely ask why. I usually point out the wrong and ask what they should have done differently. Usually it works. Usually we move into the forgiveness mode. A heart grown more wise, more thoughtful, more considerate of others. A spirit more like Christ than it had been.

This one resists such instruction. This one remains steadfast and stubborn. This one is such a challenge! I wonder what to do with this one. I wonder what God is trying to teach me through my frustrations with this one. I do know:

1. I will continue to discipline. I won't give in. Why? Because this one, like the others, needs to grow up to know the ways of the Lord. Proverbs 22:6 says, "Train a child in the way he should go, and when he grows old he will not depart from it." No matter how tough the situation, my role never changes. God wants me to train this one to live in His way, according to His word. Nothing more. Certainly, nothing less.

2. I will continue to seek God's wisdom. Ephesians 6:1 says, "Children, obey your parents in the Lord..." God calls me to raise my kids according to His ways! I can't raise them "in the Lord" if I don't spend time with Him - learning scripture and praying, asking God to show me His ways.

3. I will praise God in the midst of the challenge. Philippians 4:4 says, "Rejoice in the Lord always. Again, I say rejoice!" God's Word doesn't rejoice when life is going good and pitch a fit when you're frustrated. This is tough for me. I like to throw tantrums (yes, friends and family, I am aware of my shortcomings) when things don't go according to my plan. Perhaps God wants me to rejoice more, trust more, believe more... and complain less.

Yes, this one needs to learn so much. This one has an unrepentant heart. This one is stubborn, unyielding, and disturbingly independent. Hmmm, God could probably say the same thing about me...