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How often do we tell our kids to watch your mouth? I hope I'm not the only one! My kids forget to say please and thank you. They use slang that we find disagreeable. They get comfortable with words that aren't quite cussing, but sure aren't polite. And I'm right there, the mouth police.
- "Tell me you didn't just say what I think you said." (draped in heavy sarcasm)
- "Would you like to rephrase that?" (slightly less sarcasm)
- "Shut up!!!" (yes, I say it... usually in a very angry tone)
- "Shutteth uppeth!" (in a less angry tone)
- "Are you done?" (sarcasm drips from each word)
- "Really? Go. to. your. room." (controlled anger)
- "Say it again, and I'll get the soap." (ineffective... why do I bother?)
Please tell me I'm not the only one!
Raising kids is tough work. Some days I just don't have the energy to be the "good mom," who calmly and rationally works through misdeeds with my kids. I just react. Quickly. Sarcastically. Angrily.
When I slack off and react (see above), I really do my kids and myself an injustice. Why should they watch their mouths if I'm not watching mine? Sarcasm might help me feel better momentarily, but it sure isn't going to inspire my kids to respect me. I might feel angry, but anger inspires an angry response, not remorse or a changed heart.
When my kids' words get to me -- as they often do -- I'm just as responsible to watch my mouth. OUCH! "Because I'm the mom" doesn't really work -- it's not a valid excuse. My kids know it. To inspire my kids to pure speech, I must model it myself.
It's not easy, but it's the right thing to do.
Pleasant words are like a honeycomb,
sweetness to the soul and health to the bones.
Proverbs 16:24
My prayer today is that I will speak pleasantly, so my kids want to hear and receive my instruction. With God's help, I know I can!
Love,
6 comments:
Awesome post Karen! The words that we say speak volumes to our children and to the greater world at large as to what we REALLY believe. Stay in His presence Karen! Elizabeth.
I totally get the moral of the story but I must say I laughed so hard at "shutteth upeth"!!
Dana
Hi Karen, there is an Irresistibly Sweet Blog Award for you over at my blog. Enjoy!
Linked here from EstherIrish's blog.
This was a good post. We do have to teach our kids about their speech, and yes, even as parents we sometimes cross over lines (like with anger, over-engaging with them, etc.). We just graduated our 3rd (and last) child, and it is good to know that we can make LOTS of mistakes and the kids still turn out ok.
My first visit, and this is the first article I've read, and it was very good.
Warren,
Thank you for the encouragement. I hope my three turn out great in spite of me!
Blessings!
Great post. Rick Warren from Saddleback Church has a new study "How to Raise your Kids without Raising your Blood Pressure", which sounds just what I need :) - our Bible group have sent for the books and dvd and are hoping to do soon very soon. Will keep you posted, or might even blog on my very own progress :)
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