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My older son, Nathan, told me that when his U.S. History class discussed 9/11, his teacher had asked the class if anyone's family had been affected by the tragedy, Nathan shared our story.
We were moving from Ohio to North Carolina when that tragedy struck. Already struggling emotionally with the change and feeling lonely, I splintered apart. I couldn't take my eyes of the television -- afraid that if I looked away, something worse might happen. I was a mess... make that MESS!
It took the loving care of a church to help me heal. Months after 9/11, the real me started to emerge... not the pre-9/11 me, but the me I am today.
Nathan told his class that I became a "Mom" because of 9/11.
I had always doubted that I could ever be a good mom, so I parented in fear. When the boys were young, I did everything I could to protect them. I obsessed over their meals, their toys, even how I spoke to them. I worried. All the time. As much as I loved them, I didn't really enjoy them.
Then I discovered Psalm 46:1, "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble."
The horror of 9/11 was intended to destroy us, but God turned it around. From the bottomless pit of despair, I reached up to God. He became my refuge and strength. Trusting in Him, finally, I became the mom I was meant to be.
How about you? Do fears hold you back? Or is God your refuge and strength?
Dear God, I am in awe of You. Thank you for being my source of strength, in times of trouble and in times of peace. Be with us today -- lead us, guide us, protect us and fill us with Your love, Your purpose and Your power. Go before me today -- let everything I do bring praise to You. In Jesus' name, Amen
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4 comments:
What a beautiful testament to relying on God and putting your trust in Him! I love the feeling that God is my refuge and I can release my worries to Him. I still struggle with worry and am trying to work on that daily. Having kids, it's hard. But I remind myself that I trust God with all my loved ones and have faith that he will work according to his plans for me and them. Then I let it go.
Thank you for sharing. We wonder and worry -- so often we don't realize that others wonder and worry too.
It's not our job to be big enough to handle our kids. It's our job to realize God's big enough -- and we just help out! :)
Wow, this is quite a story! It is so hard not to be an obsessive mom, I tend to worry especially about my words (and the words of others) and what long-term effect they will have. Thanks for this call to courage!
And thanks for leaving a comment on my blog :)
didn't accept of you'r words
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