Sad good-byes

A friend of ours died suddenly Monday morning. She leaves behind her husband, two kids, parents, siblings and in laws. And lots and lots and lots of friends.

Sharon Umstead Jackson was the kind of lady everyone loves. Kind. Always happy, but not in a that bubbly over-the-top Legally Blonde kind of way. She just loved knowing you. It was simply impossible not to walk a bit lighter after a few minutes with Sharon. And at our church, new mamas would always trust Sharon with their babies! Our nursery lost a champion this week.

Her love spilled over into her kids. They're the kind of kids who everybody loves. They're always happy, but not over the top. They just love getting to know you. And, like their mom, your world is brighter after spending a few minutes with them.

That's quite a legacy!

Jimmy, Alex and Jenna, our hearts grieve with yours. We miss Sharon too. We love you all.

Sharon, until that day we meet again, you dance. You sing. You rock those babies in heaven. We love you.

Jesus said to (Mary), "I am the resurrection and the life. The one

who believes in me will live, even thought they die:

and whoever lives by believing in me will never die..."

John 11:25-26

How and Why to clean your dryer vent

We moved into our brand new home in November, 2002. We have cleaned the dryer vent exactly once. Yesterday. I'm not sure why, but a couple weeks ago I started obsessing about cleaning the dryer vent. My husband, a fairly handy guy, agreed to get it done soon. 

Yesterday, in fact! He crawled under our house to see what the project entailed, thinking he'd replace the existing vent tubing with something new. Guess what? We have a hard aluminum vent pipe system (which is probably good). Instead of replacing it, he decided to clean it and headed to the store for supplies, a dryer vent cleaning system.

He got back home, crawled under the house -- again -- and got to work. I chose not to follow him. He described the situation as serious, our 4-inch diameter pipe had filled with lint so the opening was only about 2-inches in diameter (a 75% reduction in air flow). No wonder our jeans and towels took two hours or more to dry!

I did head into the laundry room to see how the pipe opening looked (not nearly as bad as the horizontal pipe under the house!)

Here's the before:

Here's the after:

I did a little digging and discovered that more than 50% of all appliance started home fires begin with the dryer. Situations like ours, with clogged venting trigger dryers to overheat. That overheating leads to sparks and fire. Most of them are contained to damage only the dryer and its contents, but hundreds of people are injured every year. About 15 people each year die from preventable dryer and dryer vent fires.

It took my husband about an hour to clean our dryer vent once he got started. He plans to make this an annual spring cleaning job and estimates it will only take 15-20 minutes. That time translates to peace of mind and energy savings! (We dried a load of jeans last night in only 50 minutes once he was done!)

This isn't my usual post, I know, but I hope you find the information useful.

Blessings!

The things I think

As I watched my daughter swing higher and higher, the strangest thought popped in my head. "Why don't we have monkeys in the United States?"

Seriously! Wouldn't it be cool to swing while the monkeys romped in the trees?

Okapi, at Marwell Wildlife, England

Or to squeal with delight and listen as they reply?

But we don't have monkeys. Or elephants. Or zebras. 

And then I wondered why God made okapis. Did He ask Jesus one day, "What if I mix a giraffe and zebra? What do you think? Funny?" My kids come up with those kinds of things, "What if Dad had Superman's powers?" (I better be his Lois Lane!) 

The Congo gets the okapi. We get moles. Just doesn't seem fair.

The results are in!

We had a fabulously successful garage sale!!! I didn't have much in the way of "high ticket items." No furniture, appliances, electronics or video games. Old clothes, shoes, toys and books led to a tidy little college deposit of $500. NICE!

To have a successful yard sale, I suggest you try some of these tips:

1. Get everything off the ground. We borrowed tables to display our goods so people didn't have to bend over. I borrowed most of them from neighbors. I'll gladly lend mine to them when they have a sale.
2. Group like items together. We had a table for preschool toys, and next to that, a table for elementary age toys. The clothes were sorted by gender and age as well. We only sold spring and summer clothes at this sale -- we're saving winter clothes for a fall sale. Really, this is just common sense. If people can sort through your items visually as they walk up the driveway, they can quickly find what they want rather than hunt and peck through things tossed here and there.
3. Be willing to bargain. I told people up front that if they bought multiple items I'd work with them on the price. After all, the more they buy, the less I have to cart off to charity! One lady at our sale bought ten pieces of boy clothing. I gave her a 50% discount. We both walked away happy.
4. If it's broken, don't sell it. I made sure every item I offered for sale was clean, complete and not broken. Do you really want a board game with missing pieces in your house? NO! Well, neither do the people shopping your sale. Throw the junk (including stained, ripped and worn out clothes) away. Overall, you will make more money. 
5. Advertise locally. We advertised our sale on Craig's List, a local community website, and on Facebook. A couple of my Facebook friends (also friends in real life), called to ask to shop my sale the night before. They bought $75 worth of stuff that I didn't have to display the next day. Everybody won!
6. Remember to place signs at the front of your neighborhood. When people see a garage sale sign, they're drawn in. More people at your house ultimately means more money!
7. Have small bills available. This was my downfall this year. Surprisingly, most people offered me $20 bills. I didn't have enough change! Have a good supply of $5 bills, $1 bills and quarters so you can always make change. 

We're thrilled to have a bit more money saved for college -- and a lot of clutter out of our closets! I may have doubted this plan yesterday, but now I'm glad we did it.

Happy garage sales, everyone!

Garage sale... what was I thinking?

At the time, it seemed like a brilliant idea. I whipped off a text to a dear friend in my neighborhood, "Let's have a garage sale on the same day and share advertising. More people will come if there are multiple houses participating."

She must be a bit crazy, like me, because she said yes!

Today, I am knee-deep in outgrown summer clothes, old homeschool curriculum, out-grown toys (even wii games and a playstation 2). I've dug up old purses, shoes, and even the long-forgotten karate gi's. I made it to red belt before our instructor moved on. I really wanted to become a black-belt, but that's a story for another day.

We're combing through CD's, DVD's, and even the outdoor stuff.

Why did I think this was a good idea?

I'm tired. My house is a W-R-E-C-K!!! And so is the dog for that matter! Hmmm... Ellie too.

If you ask me, I think she's afraid I'll sell her Barbie dolls and zoobles. (For the right price, I might. But don't tell her that!!!)

Back to why???

Actually, this time, it's for a good cause.

HIM:

Samford University freshman to be

And he's worth it. Stop by tomorrow. AND SHOP!!! Thanks :)

Blessings,

what is your dash?

Each man's life is but a breath. Psalm 39:5

"What is your dash?"... In a cemetery every tombstone has two dates engraved on it -- birth and death. In between those dates is a dash, representing what that person did from birth until death.

"What is your dash?" (Parent Fuel, by Barry St. Clair, p. 187)

Who are you?

Where are you going?

How will you get there?

As my son and his many friends prepare to graduate from high school, this my prayer for them.

Here is my prayer, set to music. Thanks Sandbox Gems for sharing! http://www.thedashmovie.com/

Blessings,

making mistakes

We all make mistakes.

Some... we learn from.

Some... we don't.

Mistakes we learn from are mistakes worth making.

baggage limits!

Years ago, when our sweet, college bound son was just learning how to stand "literally" on his own two feet, we ventured off on our first, real family vacation. My husband and I had never flown before, much less with a little guy.

Over-packed luggage! NO!

Packing for vacation, I included everything I though we might possibly need, enough stuff to fill six suitcases and two carry-ons, plus my son's car seat and stroller!

Can you picture it? Mama, Daddy and sweet little boy park their car in the remote lot at the airport. We juggle way too much stuff to the shuttle pick-up at the end of the lot. The shuttle arrives and my over-worked, significantly over-stressed, hubby loads the bags onto the shuttle. We feel a sense of urgency, not wanting to hold up all the other travelers (no doubt laughing at our National Lampoon-like display). Of course, all this was back in the day before baggage limits!

A couple days into our trip, we needed to purchase something. I don't remember what -- what could we have left behind?! I searched bags frantically and could not find the checkbook. Panic set in! Then my husband and I fought, a real screaming match, rare for us! Finally, we realized we had lost a bag along the way! We called the airline. They didn't have it. We called the bank to put a hold on our account -- hard to do when you don't have the account number with you!

That whole vacation was covered by a cloud of fear. Would we have any money in the bank account when we returned home? Who had our checkbook? What else was in that bag? We really couldn't remember!

Luggage tag, smart travel essential

Vacation over, we had some great memories, and a few not-so-great, to take home. At our local airport, we reported our lost luggage. The clerk asked us to describe the bag. We did. She smiled, turned around and pulled our bag from a locker behind her. Handing it over to us, she said, "It's important to include contact information where you will be. We did try to call you to let you know we have your bag." Stunned, we asked what had happened. She explained that we left it at the airport shuttle pick-up and someone on a later shuttle turned it in. Relief!

Needless to say, we've come a long way since then, traveling the world without incident... well, not too much anyway! We have learned how to pack, how to experience dream vacations on a budget and what to do when the weather doesn't cooperate. And a whole lot more. I've started a new blog, traveling family to help others plan dream vacations -- without losing their luggage! Stop by for a visit and tell us where it is you want to go!

Blessings,

College bound!!!

About a year and a half ago, we made our first college road trip to Samford University. From the moment he stepped on campus, Nathan loved the school, the faculty, the students, the atmosphere and the frozen yogurt! After that, we visited a couple more schools. He auditioned for piano placement (and scholarships) and weighed his options.

From that first trip in 2010, though, nothing compared. No other school captured his heart the way Samford did. But he struggled to make a decision. Private school, even with scholarships, is more expensive than going to a state school here in North Carolina. The cost and logistics of travel (nine hours away is more difficult than three) and having friends at the state school both weighed on him. Nathan didn't want to ask us to sacrifice for him to attend Samford.

Yet, it's his heart. While he tried to say no to Samford, none of us had a peace about it.

I prayed for peace. I asked God to reconcile my heart to Appalachian State. We analyzed every aspect of each school (location, quality of education, extra-curriculars, food (he is a teen guy after all!), and friends). Samford still came out on top.

We appealed his scholarship offer... and we waited. And waited. And waited. And prayed some more for peace.

Finally, last week, the deadline approached. His scholarship offer to Appalachian State expired Sunday. Whether Nathan felt ready or not, he had to decide. At dinner Thursday, we finally backed him into the corner and forced a decision. "Nathan, where is your heart? Where do you see yourself the next four years?"

"Samford, but..." We knew his concern. The money.

We reassured him that whatever it takes, we stand behind him. We will help him make it happen. He finally gave in. Happy, yes, but not exactly jumping up and down about it. He understands that he will have to sacrifice a bit of free time to work and choose not to drink gourmet coffee every day for this to work. He knows he's just made his first, real grown-up decision.

About an hour later, we got a call from his Samford admissions advisor who told us that the School of the Arts is increasing Nathan's scholarship by $2,000 per year.

Did you catch that timing?

Our second son, Ben, sure did. He quipped, "See, when you take the first step, God can move."

Over the weekend, the decision sank in. He started thinking about his dorm room, which classes to take in the fall, and even what music he wants to study first. He sees himself there. He shares his excitement about the piano instruction he will receive. He knows he made the right choice.... not the easy choice, but the right one. Appalachian State is a great school. When it comes down to it, though, Samford University is simply more Nathan.

We are forever grateful to Dean Joe Hopkins, Recruiter Rachel Lim and Professor Don Sanders for encouraging Nathan the past year and a half. And we are thankful to Dan Hall, his admissions advisor, for communicating with us so well throughout the process. Nathan may be leaving our home, but he's moving on to a new family that I know will be a blessing to him for the rest of his life. We are thankful to our many friends who prayed right along with us the past two months! Above all, we thank God for faithfully guiding us through this entire process and honoring our prayers. We know without a doubt that Nathan is following God's plan for his life. (Jeremiah 29:11)

With a grateful heart,

26 seconds!!!

I may qualify for bad mommy of the year. Working -- writing is work, right? -- I didn't notice the time. Something made me look at the clock, 8:09 a.m. YIKES! Ellie and I pray at 8:06 (ish) before she heads out the door. AND...

photo credit

I hadn't packed her lunch yet!

"Ellie, quick. Get your shoes. I'll make your lunch. Where's your bag? Oh geesh. I'm probably going to take you to school today... I am so sorry, honey..."

The words streamed as I grabbed peanut butter and bread and slammed them down on the counter. Slap! Smack! Slather! Sandwich made in record time (I even managed to cut it in half as my princess prefers). Grab the sandwich bag and smoosh it in. Quick!

Grapes. Toss into bowl and slam on lid. (Slamming is faster than sealing, I think)

Juice box.

Pretzels.

Done!

26 seconds. Give or take. The clock still reads 8:09.

Dashing to the front door, I shoved her lunch bag into her backpack. I spun her around and plopped a kiss on her head.

We managed a prayer, "Dear Jesus, Thank you for helping us get done in time. Help Ellie to have a fun day and maybe learn something. Amen" and out the door.

She ran. She laughed. She turned to me with a wave.

"The kids are still there. Good job, Mom!"

She didn't freak out at the chaos. My chaos.

Good job, Ellie! I am very, very sorry I got lost in my stuff when it was your time.

I love you.
Mom

slow down!

Over spring break, we learned a valuable lesson. Slow down!

We took our time with dinner, not rushing to finish and get to whatever else is next. Our usual 15 minutes of "quality family time" stretched. Once we actually sat at the table and talked for TWO WHOLE HOURS! It's true!

This week, we're back to work, school and other commitments, but we crave that connection and are committed to making it happen -- at least once in a while.

Would you like to connect more with your family?

Maybe these tips will help:

1. Turn off the TV, stereo or other noisy device. Let the conversation be your music.
2. Leave the cellphones someplace else! (This has always been a rule at our house.)
3. Serve the meal in stages: salad, then main course, then dessert. And take the time to clear away the current dishes before moving on to the next course. (It forces you to slow down a little bit.) We used to pile everything on one plate, but having a small salad plate and then a larger dinner plate makes a difference!
4. Relax! Enjoy your family! Be grateful!

We don't serve different foods, just the presentation. 

Your family is special. Shouldn't they know it?

Blessings,

Who are you?

There is a generation that curses its father,

And does not bless its mother.

There is a generation that is pure in its own eyes,

Yet is not washed from its filthiness.

There is a generation -- oh, how lofty are their eyes!

And their eyelids are lifted up.

There is a generation whose teeth are like swords,

And whose fangs are like knives,

To devour the poor from off the earth,

And the needy from among men.

Proverbs 30:11-14

Some Bible passages are easier to read than others. This passage, in particular, initially reads so negatively of cursing our parents, prideful, judgmental, evil and selfish behaviors. It speaks of our society. Do whatever it takes to reach the top. Don't worry about him; he certainly doesn't care about you. You are number one! You're the best. You deserve better. Isn't that what society says? Isn't that how the people of this world behave?

Is that what the Christian says as well?

Honestly. Yes. We all do. It's called sin. The opposite of sin would read:

There are those who honor their parents,

Who admit their failures

and humble themselves before others,

Who serve the needy,

Who love.

Which version of this passage will you live today?

Love,

Friendship, such a blessing

A friend loves at all times, and a brother is born for adversity.

Proverbs 17:17

Do you have a friend who loves you no matter what? A friend who knows your failures and mistakes and loves you anyway? A friend who stands by your side, forgiving you without question when you mess up and encouraging you when you fear?

God has blessed me with friends who love me, warts and all. They know my weaknesses, my fears and my failures, but still they choose to love me as I am. 

Today I pray that I am that kind of friend to someone else. I pray I will love with the love of Jesus, always forgiving, never judging. I pray that I will be an encourager when my friend stumbles. May I be the kind of friend Jesus is to each of us.

God bless!