The journey to college -- for students and mamas

Hello my friends,

Today I'm guest blogging at a wonderful "e-zine," Bonbon Break. I've written for them before, offering travel and packing tips that I share at the travel blog (Family Travels on a Budget). This post is more about the student's journey through senior year of high school and freshman year of college -- and about the mama's journey of the heart.

Stop by Bonbon Break and let me know what you think of the post! While you're there, I hope you'll check out some other awesome posts -- this week's edition is all about ch-ch-changes!

Have a fabulous, four-day week!

Love,

Movin' on up!

"Movin' on UP" might be a stretch. No dorm room is ever as cozy as HOME! Nathan traded in his queen size bed for the traditional, lumpy dorm twin XL. He traded a fully equipped kitchen, open 24/7 for meals in the "caf."

"UP" is his first step toward independence. He decides if he gets up with the alarm or sleeps through class (Nathan, if you're reading this... GO TO CLASS!). He decides when -- or if -- to change the sheets on the bed, to toss the laundry in the hamper or on the floor, or to scrub the toilet. I have no say. He's moved on toward independence.

Before he moved "UP," he allowed us to help him unpack his stuff. Here's a peak into Nathan's new digs. Enjoy!

All loaded up and ready to go.

Can't believe it all fit -- and five people too!

Good thing I'm an expert traveler/packer.

First Day of School: Twisted!

For the first time in 18 years, 3 months and 29 days, I am home alone -- today, tomorrow, and every day through the school year. Not only that, but one of my three is at college -- all by himself! I won't be there to wake him when he sleeps through the alarm or to pray with him before he heads off to class or to make sure he eats his veggies!

Thanks to lots of wonderful, praying friends I am getting through it. Well. No tears. No anxieties or worries... though, I do obsessively check my son's twitter feed for glimpses into his collegiate world (he's being stingy with his posts!).

In honor of our life of change, I've created a "picture book" look into this season. Enjoy!

 We've walked far together, our family of five...

Change affects everyone!

Hey my bloggy friends,

I'm sure you've clued in to the fact that I'm suffering through sending our first "off to college." I tell myself it's so hard because he will be nine hours away from home, but the truth is, it will be hard because I love having him around.

Trying to fall asleep last night, and failing again, my mind raced through memories.

• Nathan at eight months, propped up on the pillows in our bed between us, everyone reading a book,
• Nathan at eighteen months, wanting desperately to be close to us at bedtime and sleeping behind his bedroom door (imagine getting in without hurting him),
• Nathan at two years, falling out of his toddler bed, rolling underneath it, sleeping through it all until he tried to sit up and couldn't. WAIL!
• Nathan's third birthday at the zoo,
• Nathan crying the day after he got his tonsils out because he couldn't go to school (and his teacher kindly stopping by to bring him a book to read while he recovered),
• Nathan conning Ben into doing their chores by playing "Pokemon trainer" -- he'd train and Ben would be the faithful, hardworking Pokemon,
• Nathan telling us he had prayed for us to have a desire to adopt a baby (thus the sudden and unexpected road to Ellie),
• Nathan marching in the Macy's parade,
• Nathan with strep, mono, pneumonia and a 104.9 degree fever all at the same time,
• Nathan teaching kids at summer church camp,
• Nathan sitting on the front row at graduation, no longer a little boy, but a young man.
• And more....

Tick! Tock! Clock

Oh my dear friends,

I haven't fallen off the planet. PROMISE! I am, however, a little busy at home. Our firstborn leaves for college Thursday... and we're getting ready.

Nathan meets Ellie for the first time.

His stuff is all packed. He is most definitely ready -- he even read ahead for one of his classes (maybe he learned a lesson or two in high school?)

Nathan and Ben hamming it up together on vacation.

He's so kind, though, concealing his anticipatory glee when I get sad. Not talking too much about next week. Taking time one on one with his siblings.

Even when I asked what he wants for dinner these last three nights, he's considerate. I know his favorites: tamale casserole (all the flavor of a tamale without the frustrating prep), chicken-sausage gumbo, and Greek. But he's staying true to himself, "...if you have time, Mom."

And now, hamming it up with his roommate to be.

Time? I thought I had all the time in the world. Wrong. He grew up. And I will miss him.

Love,

Cheap textbooks..... well, cheaper anyway.

Hello friends,

This is a practical post for college students and the parents who pay for it... If your kids are in high school, consider bookmarking this page or pinning it to your pinterest college board for quick access later!

Most universities make schedules and book requirements available online a month or two before classes start. While I really don't want to think ahead all that far, the practical side of me wants to save a few dollars wherever we can. Using the tips and resources below, we saved 25.66% on Nathan's books for fall semester. It's easy!

Here's how to do it:

1.  Look up courses and book requirements at the school website (through the student portal).
2. Record title, ISBN numbers (copy and paste to a document if you can) and school bookstore prices. We recorded prices of used/new books.
3. Use the same information (essentially the ISBN number) to search prices on other websites:
• Amazon
• Textbooks.com
• Chegg.com
4. At each site, make sure you know the condition of the book -- especially workbooks and books that include CDs -- as well as tax and shipping costs. 
5. Record the prices by site and make your purchases.
6. In a separate mailbox or file on your email, create a folder to save receipts.

Here's how it worked for us.

1. Nathan needs a total of six textbooks. At the school bookstore the used book cost was $318.70 and the new book cost was $424.80 (OUCH!)
2. We found three used books at textbooks.com for $123.83, free shipping.
3. We found a new workbook and another used textbook at Amazon for $64.64, free shipping.
4. Our total cost for five books was $188.47.
5. One book was not available at any site (new edition for 2012), so we will purchase it through the school for $89. Our grand total is $277.47, a 13% savings over all used prices and a 35% savings over new prices. Since we purchased some used and some new books, the total savings worked out to about 25%.

Some helpful tips.

1. If purchasing books to use over multiple semesters, consider buying new or "like new" used books so that it lasts as long as you need it.
2. If purchasing workbooks, consider buying new (we bought one). Is it really a time-saver or a benefit to use a workbook someone else already used? Figure out the answers yourself, using a new book.
3. Make sure books include everything they would if new, including CDs and pullout maps. You might need them!

College is expensive, but with a just a little time invested, you can rein in costs. Our two hour investment saved over $100, well worth the time.

Hope that helps.

Karen

My heart...

I've been mom for 18 years. I'm learning to let go, here at the far end of the mommyhood journey. I know I'll always be "Mom," but "mama" and all the associated needs, wants, demands, and daily interaction that go with it are about to end. It's transition time...

Last night, he asked, "Will we still see each other a lot when I'm an adult?" I love that he thinks about such things.

We talked some. I told him my Norman Rockwellian dreams of generations sleeping under the same roof, waking on Christmas morning to eat breakfast, open gifts, play together, laugh and sing. I teared up as I shared. He smiled.

I asked if it's too much to ask.

He said, "No. I'd really like that too." Really? Yes, he assured me, REALLY!

I'm so thankful for 18 years to love him every day. Face to face, I mean. I know the future means less...

Oh, my heart.... such joy, excitement, anticipation and pride. I know he's ready for the next step.

Oh my heart.... the hole is coming. I feel it already. I just pray that it doesn't hurt too much.

Shawn and Gus

Have you heard of the TV show psych? It's a hilarious comedy-mystery show featuring Shawn and Gus, BFFs since elementary school. The actors, James Roday and Dule' Hill, play perfectly off each other. The show is uproariously funny!

I just spent three days with the "real" Shawn and Gus! Yes, I did! It turns out that my son, Nathan, and his future roommate, Logan, are the inspiration for the characters on the show -- even if USA Network didn't know it back in 2006 when the series launched.

Nathan and Logan met in February, the last time we visited Samford. They hit it off right away and decided to room together. But since they only had a couple hours together back then, the families coordinated schedules to attend the same orientation -- just to be sure!

Sunday evening, we got together for dinner... except Shawn texted the wrong address to Gus. Waiting forever for them to arrive, Shawn's mom encouraged him to call Gus and find out where they were. Gus's parents, likewise, encouraged him to call and make sure they were headed to the right place -- as the address given sent them far away from Birmingham. Both guys assured their parents all was well. And we waited and drove in circles, respectively... though eventually we ate dinner, even if really late!

Monday morning, heading in to the opening session, the moms asked the boys to pose for a photo. This is what they gave us. Thanks, guys.

We managed to convince them to let us see their faces. They instantly said, "action pose." "Three. Two. One. Jump." Ta da!

Turns out the boys were just getting started. All week, they made their presence known on campus! They got a frisbee and made themselves at home on the quad -- and by the end of day two, five other guys had joined them. They closed down karaoke night with "A Whole New World" from Aladdin, sung to Shawn's orientation leader, Jasmine!

                            

The boys used their one night in the dorm to rearrange the furniture and find the "perfect layout" for the fall. They ate non-stop, joked non-stop, tweeted non-stop -- back and forth of course, and had the best two days an upcoming college freshman could possibly hope for!

They talked about other stuff, too. Un-Shawnlike, they agreed to hold each other accountable with studies, behavior and balance at school. They discussed how and when and what to involve themselves with on campus. They planned who will bring which "essentials" to school: coffee maker and video game system high on that list!

The "real" Shawn and Gus may be heading off to college for the first time, but together, this dynamic duo is undoubtedly ahead of the curve on adjustment. God arranged for them to be raised in Christian homes with remarkably similar values. He gave them compatible personalities: easy-going, fun-loving and studious. He brought them together in answer to their mutual prayers for a Godly, like-minded roommate. Shawn and Gus are most definitely ready for life at Samford.

The only question left is, "Samford, are you REALLY, TRULY READY for Shawn and Gus?"

Wait on God

A great reminder for parents,
no matter how old our kids are!

College orientation is in the books! One more item checked off our to do list before kid one launches into phase one of adult life.

Like everything else at Samford, orientation was awesome. I met university staff, got contact numbers and email addresses -- even for the executive chef at the "caf," and discovered new friends. More than anything, my heart and mind filled with peace. I know that my son is headed to a school that cares about student success -- in the classroom, in free time, and in life. For the most part, the information offered at parent sessions was exactly what I expected, though provided with a bit more excellence than anticipated. I'm not sure why, but it's always better than I expect. That's good, right?

Then I attended the parents' worship service and, well, orientation moved beyond checking off another to do list item and became a pivotal life moment. The minister shared (my paraphrase) that while this is a significant step in my child's life, it is also a big moment in my life. I was reminded that while God takes away (my son's and my relationship is about to change permanently), He also gives. The time I spent raising my son is done... yes, I still get to be the mama and offer advice, but not as often and only when asked. That means I've done this job well. Now it's time to discover what God has next for me. I do not end when my son leaves home.

The minister encouraged us to wait on God with open hearts and hands, to discover the next step in His plan for our lives. It's not over -- it's time for a change. It's time to step into what's next... 

Not just for my son, but for me.

May the God of hope fill you

with all joy and peace

as you trust in Him 

so that you may overflow with hope

by the power of the Holy Spirit.

Romans 15:13

The service closed with that verse, my life verse. God couldn't have said "I love you" any more clearly.

God bless!

College Orientation... where did the time go?

So, number one and I are in Birmingham again. This time it's orientation. YIKES! Soon my son will live here -- and I'll be there.

So far, I've been excited about the whole thing. But, like he texted to me the other day, "This whole orientation thing just hit me." It's hitting me too.

Our road trips these past few years have been so fun. But soon, he won't be road tripping with me. His weekends will be filled with new friends and homework and frisbee. But not me.

The next time we come here, I'll leave him behind. To fend for himself. Alone. I know he's ready.

The question is, "Am I?"

Reflections

Oh how I wish I had a cool pic for this post... alas...

I've been asked dozens of times about the tears. Yet, I have not cried. My heart swells with joy at my son's accomplishments, his thought process as he prepares to go forward, and his drive to give his best.

While he cherished his Tigger outfit, he's now my J.Crew man, wearing dapper ties because that's who he now is.

Those collages and projects of the elementary years gave way to lengthy essays analyzing the Life of Pi.

Early piano recitals involved learning technique-friendly piano book songs, but now he wows people with Rachmaninoff.

His "job" when he was little was simply to clean his room, but now he drives off to work asking for extra shifts to save for the fall.

Freshman year, he fell for the "good enough argument" (an honors B equals an non-honors A), but this year he achieved straight A's in AP classes, finally appreciating that "good enough" means giving your best.

This chapter of my son's life comes to a close... but as I look back, I don't long for the Tigger-loving days. I rejoice that he has chosen to listen to our advice, he desires to give his best at piano, school, work and in relationships, and that he loves God with all his heart. I'm thankful for the foundational early years, but I am thrilled for today.

He's not done growing yet... I have a feeling that when we reach the next milestone, we'll look back on four years of college with same joy, pride and love we have now.

By humility and the fear of the Lord

Are riches and honor and life.

Proverbs 22:4

Congratulations, Nathan! Always, finish strong!

With love,

Mom

All Grown Up!

Eighteen years (and a few days) ago,

God blessed us with our first son.

Nathan Michael Dawkins,

blessed with the confidence to be himself,

despite the "ordinary" middle name with which he is burdened.

From the beginning, our little man.

April 29, 1994

His vocabulary and personality quickly grew.

His first sports love, the Cleveland Indians

and Kenny Lofton.

And his daddy's baseball hat!

Summer, 1995

He's our silly boy,

hamming it up to make anyone laugh.

 1998

Always protective of his little brother,

a trait we greatly appreciated as they grew.

1998

Adventurous begins to describe him,

whether learning karate,

2002

Or experiencing everything China had to offer,

from the Great Wall,

to the food,

to holding his baby sister for the very first time.

March, 2005

 Our t-shirt loving boy

occasionally sported a button-up shirt,

if only for Easter pictures

and to please Mom.

2007

No more home school

once he learned that he could join the band

and go to New York City

to March in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade.

November, 2008

Sophomore year,

he discovered the power of dressing up,

wearing a suit first for his

National Honor Society induction.

 2010

His dressy ways continue.

As does his love for his sister (and brother).

He is passionate for God, piano and kindness.

He doesn't pretend. He knows who he is.

2011

As much as an 18 year old "city mouse" can anyway.

Eiffel Tower, 2012

Eighteen years with this young man

is more amazing than I could have dreamed.

We are truly blessed

that God allowed us

to parent you.

Taking time out from basketball with Ben

for a celebratory cupcake!

April 29, 2012

Nathan, as always, we pray that you know the love, joy, and peace

that comes from a deep personal relationship with Jesus.

We pray you will trust Him to guide your steps

 through college and into the future.

Welcome to adulthood!

We love you!

Mom and Dad

Garage sale... what was I thinking?

At the time, it seemed like a brilliant idea. I whipped off a text to a dear friend in my neighborhood, "Let's have a garage sale on the same day and share advertising. More people will come if there are multiple houses participating."

She must be a bit crazy, like me, because she said yes!

Today, I am knee-deep in outgrown summer clothes, old homeschool curriculum, out-grown toys (even wii games and a playstation 2). I've dug up old purses, shoes, and even the long-forgotten karate gi's. I made it to red belt before our instructor moved on. I really wanted to become a black-belt, but that's a story for another day.

We're combing through CD's, DVD's, and even the outdoor stuff.

Why did I think this was a good idea?

I'm tired. My house is a W-R-E-C-K!!! And so is the dog for that matter! Hmmm... Ellie too.

If you ask me, I think she's afraid I'll sell her Barbie dolls and zoobles. (For the right price, I might. But don't tell her that!!!)

Back to why???

Actually, this time, it's for a good cause.

HIM:

Samford University freshman to be

And he's worth it. Stop by tomorrow. AND SHOP!!! Thanks :)

Blessings,

what is your dash?

Each man's life is but a breath. Psalm 39:5

"What is your dash?"... In a cemetery every tombstone has two dates engraved on it -- birth and death. In between those dates is a dash, representing what that person did from birth until death.

"What is your dash?" (Parent Fuel, by Barry St. Clair, p. 187)

Who are you?

Where are you going?

How will you get there?

As my son and his many friends prepare to graduate from high school, this my prayer for them.

Here is my prayer, set to music. Thanks Sandbox Gems for sharing! http://www.thedashmovie.com/

Blessings,

College bound!!!

About a year and a half ago, we made our first college road trip to Samford University. From the moment he stepped on campus, Nathan loved the school, the faculty, the students, the atmosphere and the frozen yogurt! After that, we visited a couple more schools. He auditioned for piano placement (and scholarships) and weighed his options.

From that first trip in 2010, though, nothing compared. No other school captured his heart the way Samford did. But he struggled to make a decision. Private school, even with scholarships, is more expensive than going to a state school here in North Carolina. The cost and logistics of travel (nine hours away is more difficult than three) and having friends at the state school both weighed on him. Nathan didn't want to ask us to sacrifice for him to attend Samford.

Yet, it's his heart. While he tried to say no to Samford, none of us had a peace about it.

I prayed for peace. I asked God to reconcile my heart to Appalachian State. We analyzed every aspect of each school (location, quality of education, extra-curriculars, food (he is a teen guy after all!), and friends). Samford still came out on top.

We appealed his scholarship offer... and we waited. And waited. And waited. And prayed some more for peace.

Finally, last week, the deadline approached. His scholarship offer to Appalachian State expired Sunday. Whether Nathan felt ready or not, he had to decide. At dinner Thursday, we finally backed him into the corner and forced a decision. "Nathan, where is your heart? Where do you see yourself the next four years?"

"Samford, but..." We knew his concern. The money.

We reassured him that whatever it takes, we stand behind him. We will help him make it happen. He finally gave in. Happy, yes, but not exactly jumping up and down about it. He understands that he will have to sacrifice a bit of free time to work and choose not to drink gourmet coffee every day for this to work. He knows he's just made his first, real grown-up decision.

About an hour later, we got a call from his Samford admissions advisor who told us that the School of the Arts is increasing Nathan's scholarship by $2,000 per year.

Did you catch that timing?

Our second son, Ben, sure did. He quipped, "See, when you take the first step, God can move."

Over the weekend, the decision sank in. He started thinking about his dorm room, which classes to take in the fall, and even what music he wants to study first. He sees himself there. He shares his excitement about the piano instruction he will receive. He knows he made the right choice.... not the easy choice, but the right one. Appalachian State is a great school. When it comes down to it, though, Samford University is simply more Nathan.

We are forever grateful to Dean Joe Hopkins, Recruiter Rachel Lim and Professor Don Sanders for encouraging Nathan the past year and a half. And we are thankful to Dan Hall, his admissions advisor, for communicating with us so well throughout the process. Nathan may be leaving our home, but he's moving on to a new family that I know will be a blessing to him for the rest of his life. We are thankful to our many friends who prayed right along with us the past two months! Above all, we thank God for faithfully guiding us through this entire process and honoring our prayers. We know without a doubt that Nathan is following God's plan for his life. (Jeremiah 29:11)

With a grateful heart,

Memorial Box Monday: The Job

Our almost-man heads off to college this fall. Mingled with the excitement that comes with acceptance letters is a healthy respect for the cost of college. We had a small college fund growing for him... right now, like the rest of the economy, it's struggling to get back to where it was a few years ago... so he wonders whether the scholarships will come.

Listening as he shared his concerns last week, God nudged my memory...

When I went to college, almost 30 years ago, college funds weren't the norm. A combination of student loans and part-time jobs paid the bill. Freshman year, I worked in "dorm security." There I was, all 96 pounds of me, working 11 p.m. to 4 a.m. as "security" for The Ohio State football team dorm. What??? Whose idea was it to put me there? Not mine, I assure you! (Thankfully, William White, a defensive back on the Buckeye team back in 1984 often sat in the lobby with me as my enforcer when the 300 lb. linemen tried to give me a hard time!)

Anyway, after doing that for a year, I knew it wasn't the way to survive college. I needed sleep, for one thing! Sophomore year, I applied to every campus job available. Rejection after rejection, I got upset. I knew I was a hard worker. I had good grades. I didn't understand why I was stuck in the stupid security job.

One rainy day (typical Ohio day), I went back to my dorm after another heartbreaking rejection with student health services. I stood in front of the mirror, hair drenched, mascara running down my cheeks and cried out to God. You know those moments when you just can't take it anymore and you cry out to God in desperation? Defeated. Empty. Nothing left of you. That's where I was.

Within moments, the phone rang. The lady from health services was on the line asking if I still wanted a job. Ummmm.... YES!!! She explained that I'd have to interview with the Department of Environmental Safety (responsible for OSHA compliance for chemicals, cleaning supplies, noise and more). She gave me directions and the contact person's name. I cleaned up and ran to the interview... and got the job.

What did God give me? A cushy office job with a "word processor" I could use during the secretary's lunch hour to write my papers (for you young readers, this was back in the day when a word processor took the space of an entire room). A group of caring people who "adopted" me into their families, offering me a place to stay when the dorms closed on long weekends. A caring environment that celebrated my birthday with catered lunch, cake and gifts. Mentors who helped me apply to law school and sorted through my options with me. Friends who took time off work to attend my graduation (Ohio State gives actual diplomas at the ceremony -- and somehow Dave, who was a Michigan graduate, put U of M stickers in my diploma... what a laugh!). God gave me more than a job. He gave me a haven of caring and love, more than a girl could ever hope for.

Decades later, after teaching college, being a criminal prosecutor with the satisfaction of taking bad guys off the streets, and other wonderful jobs, this "job" is still the best I ever had. It had nothing to do with the work, and everything to do with God making sure I was cared for. He knew what I needed in my young adult years. And He provided. Abundantly!

As my almost-man looks ahead, I pray he understands that he is never alone. I pray he discovers that God cares for him more than any one or any plan ever could. Of course, I pray for the desired scholarships, but I know that God will put him in the exact situations he needs to become the man God has always wanted him to be. I pray that my almost-man's faith grows with each step forward that he takes... with God.

For I know the plans I have for you, 

declares the Lord,

plans to prosper you and not to harm you,

plans to give you hope and a future.

Jeremiah 29:11

Memorial Box Monday was started by Linny at "A Place Called Simplicity." Please visit her blog to learn more -- and share your memories of God's goodness too!

The Mailman

Have you ever had one of those oh-no-I-forgot-to-get-this-in-the-mail mad dashes to the mailbox hoping against hope that you beat the mailman to your box?

That happened to me Saturday. As I ran out the front door, I saw the mail truck just three houses away. Happy dance! I beat the mailman (ours is actually a mail lady). YAY!!!

I waited for her at the end of the driveway. When she got to me, I said, "I thought I had missed you." She chuckled and said, "Christmas season mail always slows me down." Then she handed me three catalogs and the rest of our mail.

Walking toward the house, I flipped through the non-catalog mail. Nathan got a big envelope from Belmont University (big envelopes from colleges are good). I ran.

Sadistically torturing me, Nathan painstakingly opened the envelope. He read the cover letter. Carefully. Slowly. I am certain he's never read a textbook that thoroughly, not even a page of a textbook! Next, he flipped open the folder that came with the letter and vigilantly explored that material. True torture.

Watching and waiting, not so patiently, I realized something profound: every aspect of our lives is shared with the mailman. Or mail lady.

It probably starts with the wedding, mailing our invitations to friends, family, and the people we don't know but mom insists on adding to the list. The mailbox fills with responses: yes, no, maybe. There's no mistaking those small response envelopes, though.

A few years later, birth announcements come and go. The box fills with diaper coupons and children's life insurance offers. Toy catalogs arrive. Christmas card deliveries, with pictures of our growing children tucked proudly inside, swell during the early child rearing years.

And now... college mail. Inquiries from schools across the country started appearing early in Nathan's sophomore year and the volume has grown exponentially with each passing semester. Now, updates from the schools he actually applied to arrive and of course, the big envelopes. 

Next will be high school graduation announcements and then, soon after, care packages, lovingly packed, will be sent from our box to his.

Through it all, the mailman is there... a quiet, essential part of our lives.

Detours by God

My senior year in college, the dean called me to his office. That was not typical and I was really nervous. He got straight to the point, "Karen, you need to go to law school." What??? I can honestly say becoming a lawyer NEVER had entered my mind before that moment. Inside, I laughed hysterically. To the dean, I said, "I don't know a thing about law school." He explained that I would have to take the LSAT and then apply to schools.

I had no money for gas to get to college. How would I pay for the LSAT? The dean had an answer for that too. Ohio State's Law School had a fund for financially needy students. He sent me to the law school.

That happened to be the last day to register. The receptionist handed me a form to complete. She disappeared into another room for a few moments, then returned to tell me I was registered. She handed me a tri-fold brochure that included a brief explanation of the test and question types. She told me where and when to report for the test. Easy!

And then... test day.

A mob of hopeful attorneys-to-be waited outside the test room. Some were taking the test for the third time, hoping for scores that would finally get them into law school. I remember thinking I had no business being there if they had taken study courses and still couldn't score well.

The proctor let us into the room and I sat down with pencils, pop tart and pepsi. Closing my eyes, I offered this prayer, "God, I have no idea what I'm doing here. If You want me to go to law school, You better show up big time." Like the Israelites who were cornered with the Egyptians in pursuit in Exodus 14, I had no place to turn. Either God showed up or I didn't go. That day, I lived out Moses' instruction in Exodus 14:14, "The Lord will fight for you. You need only be still." When we get to the end of ourselves, God shows up. We just need to be still and trust Him.

The test results came.

God showed up. With HIS help, I scored in the top 5% in the country. I was offered a full tuition scholarship to law school. God had a plan for my life -- something I never would have chosen for myself. Something I had never considered. How cool is that?

Maybe God has a plan for you that you don't even know about. Will you trust Him with your life?

Or maybe you know God has a better plan -- peace for your family, or contentment in your circumstances, or joy in living -- but you just don't "feel" it.

Trust me, I didn't "feel it" for law school, but God did. Won't you trust Him today? Just BE STILL. TRUST His plan. One day, you'll yourself like the Israelites, victorious. Then you can shout praises too.

And when the Israelites saw the mighty hand of the LORD displayed against the Egyptians, the people feared the LORD 

and put their trust in him...

Exodus 14:31

1237 Miles, 58 Hours

A goofy moment during his senior photo session 

Last Thursday, Nathan and I left on a whirlwind road trip to Samford University for his piano audition. He's already been accepted to the university, and we'll find out soon if he's accepted into the School of the Arts. Then, we wait some more to learn if he is accepted into the honors college. AND a little longer to learn about scholarships. Applying to music school is NOT for the faint of heart!

This particular road trip, traveling 1237 miles in 58 hours, meant we spent most of our time in the car. We talked about so many different things: Did you and dad have a "song" when you were dating? (No.) Do you think Joe Pa should have been fired? (Yes, No, Maybe? I need more info.)

Being a mom, I noticed some other things... and reminisced a bit as well.

Shortly after we left, Nathan fell asleep in the seat beside me. Some copilot! I remembered the four month old baby he once was. For some reason, one short ride home from the grandparents' house, he decided he'd had enough of carseats! He screamed and screamed. Puzzled, and worried, we pulled off the road trying to figure out what was wrong. I remember crying the rest of the trip home, so worried for my baby.

Fast forward two years to our move two hours south to Delaware, Ohio. Rob had to stay behind and finish his medical residency, but Nathan and I moved when our house became available. We left late in the evening, figuring he'd sleep on the drive. No way! Even though we set out about 10:00 p.m., Nathan jabbered away in his carseat, waved to every trucker and sang at the top of his lungs. Arriving at the new house, I unpacked his pack-n-play and my air mattress and set us up for the night. Wearily, I tucked him in and collapsed into my bed. He jabbered more. And more and more. Finally, I told him he could talk all night if he wanted, but I was going to sleep!

Moving to North Carolina a few years later, we made many trips between Ohio and NC while we waited for the house to sell. Nathan knew how to entertain us on those drives. He read books to his little brother and helped me keep him fed. We played hilarious games like "roller coaster," where he'd pretend the West Virginia mountain highway was a roller coaster and would lean left or right as we "flew" down the hills. He'd even say clackety-clack as we chugged uphill. Ben followed his lead and then they'd crack up.

How funny to see my man-boy all these years later, closing his eyes in slumber on a drive. I won't soon forget, perhaps never, our "skittles challenge," guessing the flavor of each skittle before eating it in the dark. I know every time I look at the moon hanging low and heavy on the horizon that I'll watch for it to float high and shrink away in the sky and remember a silly conversation (I'd share it here, but I'm sure it will be lost in translation). I'm confident that I'll spend the rest of my life avoiding the reflectors that separate the lanes on long drives.

We got home late Saturday night. Before Nathan headed off to bed, he wrapped me in a big man-boy hug and said, "Thanks for a fun trip, Mom." All I could think was, "No. Thank you." 

"Where is your faith?"

Thinking. Thinking. Thinking.

Nathan enjoyed his visit to App State. He loves the program and the campus. He likes having friends already there and all the activities available to students.

He enjoyed his visit to Samford University too. Great program, though they don't offer his specifically desired major which means he'll have to do the major-minor thing. Not too bad. Incredible professors. Beautiful campus and friendly students.

Of course, Belmont offers not only his preferred major, but the premiere location -- Nashville. The heart of music recording and production.

Right now, he's feeling the stress of the decision. If only he could put Samford's campus and piano professors in Nashville with his friends, the activities, and the food from App State. He can't lose wherever he goes, but the decision will not be easy. (HINT to anyone from the school admissions office who might be reading this... scholarship offers will weigh in heavily!)

Coffee in hand -- Feelin' Collegiate!

I've been his sounding board as he processes the decision, listening as he weighs and reweighs the pros and cons of each school. It's time to bring in the expert. Jesus. In Luke 8:25, Jesus asks the disciples, "Where is your faith?" as the wind and water rage around their boat. Jesus calmed the stormy sea for them. He will do the same for Nathan.

My advice to my son, and all the students making weighty post-graduation decisions, is this: Trust Jesus. He will calm the storms raging in your head as you make your decision. He will lead you, just as He promises in Proverbs 3:5-6, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In ALL YOUR WAYS, acknowledge Him and He will make your path straight."

Pray.
Wait.
Listen.
Go.

As Romans 8:31 puts it, "If God is for us, who can be against us?" God is bigger than this decision. He wants the very best for you. He will lead you to it!

Prayerfully,